“I Also Collected The Soup I Made For Him” — Nigerian Women on Reclaiming Gifts After Breakups 

Gifting feels easy when you’re in love. But deciding who keeps the items when a relationship ends? Not so much. 

We spoke to Nigerian women who refused to walk away empty-handed after their relationship ended. From AirPods to a pot of pepper soup, here’s what they took back.

My ex and I had a very messy breakup. Not long after, he asked for the iPad he’d bought me because his sister was starting school and needed it. I knew exactly what he was doing. So  I told him there was no problem. I’d return the iPad if he returned everything I’d ever bought him.

He thought I was joking, but I showed up at his house with the iPad and left with my things. I collected the PS5 I’d bought him, the work chair I got him for his birthday, the air fryer, and every other thing I could remember paying for. He couldn’t believe it. I told him he was welcome to come to my house and collect anything he’d ever bought me too.

I bought my first car with my own money shortly after I got married. Although it belonged to me, my husband gradually took control of it. He’d drop me off at work and use the car all day before picking me up later. 

It wasn’t convenient, but I believed what was mine was his. Eventually,  I saved up for another car and left that one for him. 

Then, in 2019, I found out he’d been cheating on me with a younger woman and driving her around in my car. When we separated briefly, the first thing I asked for was my car. He couldn’t believe it, but I insisted.

I eventually sold the car and kept the money. We eventually reconciled, but since then, I’ve been much stricter with what belongs to me.

Before our divorce, my husband and I ran a food business together. When our marriage started falling apart, I suggested selling the business and splitting the proceeds, but he refused. He wanted us to keep running it together, but I knew he mostly wanted to keep benefiting from my labour. 

Although we both contributed to the business, I handled most of the cooking and day-to-day operations, while he did very little. Besides, I had no interest in working alongside someone I was divorcing.

We’d also been saving money in a joint account to expand the business, so I withdrew an amount equivalent to my investment and took the delivery bikes I’d paid for.

He was angry, but I stood my ground. If he wanted to keep the business, he could, but I wasn’t leaving my investment behind.

I was living with my boyfriend when our relationship ended. Instead of trying to resolve our issues, he sent me a text saying he’d stay with his friends for a few days so I could pack my things and leave. 

That message pissed me off, so I did exactly what he asked. I packed my belongings and took everything I’d contributed to the house. I took the birthday cards I’d given him, our pictures, and even the pepper soup I’d cooked and stored in the freezer.

A few days later, he accused me of taking some of his belongings and threatened to involve the police. I ignored him.

I once gave this guy the original AirPods 4 because he’d been talking about them for months. I was a student and didn’t even own AirPods myself, so buying them left me seriously broke.

Not long after his birthday, he started acting differently and eventually told me he was no longer interested. I couldn’t stop wondering if he’d deliberately waited until after his birthday to end things.

I went to his place hoping we could talk things through, but he made it clear we were done. Then I spotted the AirPods beside his bed. How could I leave them behind? On my way out, I quietly slipped them into my bag.

Later, he sent a text asking if I’d seen them. I told him I hadn’t. Whether he knew I took them or not, I don’t care. At least I’m the one using AirPods now.

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